“Be careful and don’t jump on something”

The people were very surprised, though, when I offered to compete after the meal, and see who could shoot best. They had never ever had a competition before! When you compete, there is a winner and a loser, and they don’t like that. When people compete, one competitor is distinguished from the other, and that was not proper in their culture. One was always part of the tribe and never a separate individual. It was unheard of that one of them would be better at something than the other. They only agreed to the competition because I was not part of their group, and of course, I missed the banana tree and the man competing with me hit it. How differently the people in this culture thought also became clear when the first people could be baptized. As soon as their leaders wanted to be baptized, they were all ready to be baptized. In other words, they would all be baptized or none of them would. Years later, when the missionaries began to talk about the Lord’s Supper, it appeared difficult to explain that each person had to search his own heart, and that while some could attend, others could not. They had not learned to think for themselves!

Balance
Westerners don’t need so much help and feel very independent from others in the community and church. “I don’t agree with that” is a very common sentence, and it is rather an honor when you have the courage to voice your personal opinion. It can feel good to single yourself out and your self-esteem may grow by it. It even seems that in North America and Western Europe, we verbalize personal opinions ever more strongly. Now, we all agree that we are individuals and that everyone is responsible for his own body and soul. People need to learn to think for themselves. On the other hand, it is unbiblical to disconnect from others, to be too much on your own. We shouldn’t think too highly of ourselves when we try to find out what is right and wrong. We need to be cautious. The congregation and church of which we are part is not a gathering of loose individuals, but rather is comparable to a body. We should make up our minds together! The first Christian congregation felt united, and together they continued in the apostle’s doctrine, the office bearers being leaders in searching the Scriptures. There needs to be a balance between groups and individual thinking. When differences surface, we need to deal with them as a congregation or denomination. Belonging to a congregation requires the members to respect one another and to prevent unnec-essary and painful tension. For example, read Acts 15 on how we need to solve differences in opinion and how the Antioch congregation was kept together.

Advice
You may feel your personal identity being attacked when you are encouraged to listen to others before expressing your own view. In North America, we suffer more than before from individualism, and there seems to be less patience for listening to others. We prefer listening to our hearts. What advice do we need? Think about whether we have gone too far and become too individualistic in our views. Next time when you cannot agree, be careful and do not jump on something. Ask your parents, read upon the issue, listen to the office bearers. Sometimes it may even be better to swallow your objections and respect those placed over you. That is really biblical. Also consider the apostle Paul’s advice not to offend each other. Sure, we must search the Scriptures because we have a personal responsibility and we need to examine our own hearts, something no one else can do for us, but it is also biblical to keep the unity, to be humble, to surrender. In our marriages, in our families, in our churches we need to make things work. May the Lord keep us from being lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God (2 Timothy 3:2-4). We really need to heed that warning. May the Lord also give us as office bearers the patience to listen to you as young people, to take your questions seriously, and to explain to the best of our ability what we read in the Scriptures.

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Bovenstaand artikel is eerder verschenen in Insight into, het jongerenblad van de Gereformeerde Gemeenten in Noord-Amerika. Insight intoverschijnt zes keer per jaar en kost € 14.
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